My second race 4THEM: 10km Gunrun
The seeding system of the gun run makes use of your previous best official 10km time. In the entry form of the event, you must supply that time so that the organizers can seed the faster people in front to ensure that the serious runners can run from the get-go without any obstruction. I, however, had never run an official road race before and could thus not supply the organizers with such a time. This meant that I had to start way back in Batch D, behind literally thousands of other runners and walkers.
With the faint sound of the gun, which was fired a few hundred meters ahead of me next to the start line, we slowly but surely start to move. Barely. Boxed in with nowhere to go, I move upstream like a fish in an overpopulated school. I was walking, thinking of everything that I am going to feel when I cross that start line and begin to run my heart out.
As I finally edge over the line where the front-runners had stood a few minutes ago, I start my watch and feel my heart waking up and kicking into gear. My eyes are desperately searching for cracks in the wall of people in front of me where I can claw through, my race has finally begun... With fleeting feet, I side-step my way through the crowd. I was running on the edges of sidewalks, jumping over bushes, and ducking underneath the swinging arms of other enthusiastic runners, trying to make use of any glimpse of an opportunity that may present itself for me to escape this crowded web of runners. After about two and a half kilometers of non-stop obstacle course racing, there it is, a relatively open stretch of road where I can open up my stride and finally just run. My first five kilometers flew over without leaving a shadow, and as I looked down at my watch, I realized that I had just ran my fastest 5K ever. As elated as I was about my pace thus far, I began fearing whether I had maybe gone out too fast, and sure enough, with a little over three kilometers to go to the finish, my legs were feeling less like pogo sticks and more like slow-go sticks. All of a sudden, I started passing fewer people, and it took much longer to gain ground on the runners in front of me than it did just a few minutes ago.
If you have not run a race before, like really ran, I can tell you this. That there comes a time in your race, maybe even a few times, that you start to contemplate why you are where you are, doing what you are doing. Some dread it, some fear it and others are ignorant to it, but that time will surely come knocking on your mind’s door, and until you take the time to address it, it will not go away. Slowly but surely it will steal your will to keep on, leaving you empty on the side of the road.
That moment was upon me now, where I had to drink a cup of tea with Mr. Uncomfortable and make it known to him that he is welcome to make himself comfortable because I was busy running for a cause greater than myself. In times where this guest, you can call him Pain or Suffering or Loss or whatever you like, comes to knock at your door, you must be prepared. You must be anchored. One important thing is that something cannot be anchored to itself, it must be anchored to something much stronger and much larger than itself. Just as a ship’s anchor grabs the ocean floor, so we should always reach towards the Word of God and guidance of God, in troublesome times, normal times and times of elation, and should our reasons for our actions be not about ourselves but the kingdom of Jesus and our love for His children which flows out of our will to love God.
As the seconds on my watch also seemed to tire and go by slower and slower, I had to remind myself for Who and for what I am running. I was running for God and the persecuted church. I was running so that Christians may somewhere own a Bible and experience the true joy found In Christ and in living a biblical life. My anchor had found its ocean floor and no more could Mr. Uncomfortable scare and taunt me with his questions and untruthful remarks. I had been given my answer to the question, “Why am I enduring this pain?” and from that moment onwards repeated it over and over in my mind and did not stop until I had crossed the finish line. And although my legs were most definitely not feeling any better, I was able to pick up my pace once more and finish my race strong.
Although it was a good race for me, considering that I did not pass out from dehydration and ran a very good time, I felt that I should have given more and should have trusted and focused on God more during my race, I should have kept my ocean floor in my thoughts from the start.
Before the race, I had written down a prayer whilst I was spending quiet time with God, where I almost accepted that I was going to run a time of 33:40 for the 10km. Thinking back, it must have been the Holy Spirit interceding in my thoughts as I would not have been so optimistic. (I just want to establish that we should be very careful about what we accredit to the Holy Spirit, because it could just as well had been me dreaming and hoping for a really good time so that I can have it to my name. Pride is a trap that I so easily tend to fall into.) Because in running you can form a very good idea of what you are capable of, based on your training. But a small voice in my head had said, “A 35-minute 10km is still very good. If I can just run a 35-minute race, which is much more doable for me although I still would need the help of God to achieve it, I will be more than satisfied.”
And that is where I had failed. I was satisfied! No longer did the race go about God and His church, about the persecuted brothers and sisters but about a time, a pretty average time compared to what I should have been running for. I had lost my race because my faith was small. I was not willing to adjust my view about myself in this world and step out of the center of things so that I can let God take over. I had lost my race against the horses before it had even started.
/// Just a small ‘incision’: Recently I listened to a sermon of Charles Spurgeon on prayer and his understanding of prayer is crucial as to not be misled. In summary he concluded from scripture that God answers prayer according to His will, if you ask God something in prayer with a sincere heart and It is part of God’s will for you, He will surely give it to you. But this can easily be misunderstood or misjudged by us. We cannot turn against God and place blame on Him if we pray for some ill in our lives or our surroundings to go away and it is not immediately or ever answered. For the devil will use our misunderstandings to harden our hearts against God. But we must in our prayer believe that God is doing what is right and keep loving God and keep on asking and praising in prayer. How much time are you spending in prayer, sincere and thoughtful prayer to Jesus with the Holy Spirit as your minds guide? ///
One of the Bible verses that God has provided me with when I started praying about the Opendoors #4THEM initiative is Jeremiah 12:5 which reads, “If racing against mere men makes you tired, how will you race against horses? If you stumble and fall on open ground, what will you do in the thickets near the Jordan?”
We all need to decide whether we are going to race against men or take up the challenge of running against horses. Are we mindful of that path that God wants to set us on? That path which we cannot fathom, that path where we see no way of getting to the other side without the magnificent Grace of God. For we cannot race against men and say that we have faith, for it does not require any. Firstly, because a race against men is that of our own making where every next step is safe. And secondly, by living in faith - constantly living in the Word, praying with a sincere and repentant heart, and letting Gods influence on your soul spill over into your thoughts and actions – you would automatically be set on the start line of your race against horses. Just like the dodging and side-stepping of people in the first five kilometers of my race had occupied my focus, in the same way, the things of a worldly footrace will drain your energy and keep your soul from loving God and running alongside Christ.
But a race against horses is not glamorous. Think about Jesus’s life on Earth. It is not a race on a wide-open stretch of tarred road. It is a narrow pathway making it’s way on thin ledges and over peaks, through rivers and over slippery rocks, with steep ascents and leaps of faith, with twists and turns and desert dunes. It is scary, but only if you do not know where God is and how He feels about you. You should know within yourself how God feels about you. Because it is only His love for you that can soften your hardened heart and penetrate your soul. It is only by feeling His love through spending time with Him, that your heart will long to please Him in every moment and that you will say farewell to your earthly ways.
With all the sincerity that you have and all your heart, seek God. Seek that path that He wants you to walk. Pray, pray, and once more, pray with the help of the Holy Spirit to Jesus, our Advocate and go run against the horses.
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